ungarmax:

me, dumping a load of freshly washed but unfolded laundry on my bed: boy i’m sure gonna be pissed about this when i want to go to bed

(via malytwotails)

kisamas:

kisamas:

potion that makes you breathe

(via haxardagron)

outofcontextdnd:

“No! No! God damn…Why are all these skeletons at the beach!?”

quorpiest:

dragontatoes:

Warm blooded creature: wow I’m chilly

Warm blooded creature: *vibrates*

Cold blooded creature: wow I’m chilly

Cold blooded creature: goes into a coma

(via haxardagron)

How to get ready in the morning

thezeldageek:

vorchagirl:

sweetiepie08:

Step 1: Stay in bed as long as you possibly can. 

Step 2: Speed run. 

I feel called out.

if you roll off the bottom of your bed at just the right angle you can clip through the floor straight into the shower saving precious time

(via haxardagron)

ceeberoni:

rcktpwr:

fill your body with cranberries so the horse that kills you gets a sensual surprise when he begins to feed

i will give the  horse that kills me no such luxury

(via malytwotails)